Money talk can get intense sometimes. Today, we're here to lighten things up a little bit with some of our favorite funny money quotes.
But, since this is Clever Girl Finance, we're all about empowering women by providing accurate financial guidance and helping them to make lots of money. These funny money quotes aren't just funny – they teach real-life lessons, too!
The best funny money quotes
What are some famous quotes about money? Read on for some of the best funny sayings about money, funny saving money quotes, and more. Plus, learn how they can teach us to be smart about money!
Hilarious thoughts about shopping and spending
These funny finance quotes show us that it's ok to spend on "frivolous" things if they make you happy. Just make sure to budget for them and not buy them to impress others, which would be the wrong use of money.
1. "I like my money where I can see it, hanging in my closet." – Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City
The Sex and the City character, Carrie Bradshaw, is famous for her enviable designer wardrobe. She's also somewhat infamous for spending so much on shoes that she occasionally struggled to afford her rent. What can her quote teach us about spending, particularly on luxury goods? Is it just for rich people?
There's absolutely nothing wrong with spending your money on clothes and accessories. Maybe you want to buy a Chanel handbag or another designer item.
Where you can go wrong, however, is if you don't save up for your splurges or spend money that you don't genuinely have. And, remember, there are ways to be fashionable on a budget, so if a designer item isn't in the cards for you yet, you can still look fabulous.
2. "Too many people spend money to buy things they don't want to impress people they don't like." – Will Rogers
This quote from Will Rogers reminds us to be thoughtful about our spending. Before making big purchases, ask yourself why you want that item. Do you truly want it, or are you buying it to impress someone else?
There's a problem with keeping up with the Joneses. Always buying the latest and greatest things to impress your neighbors is only becoming more widespread, and it takes too much energy. With the influence of social media, the Joneses are no longer limited to our neighbors – it's the whole world.
Be extra careful to focus on yourself and what you want, not on what others have. Or what you think you should have to impress them.
3. "I love money. I love everything about it. I bought some pretty good stuff. Got me a $300 pair of socks. Got a fur sink. An electric dog polisher. A gasoline-powered turtleneck sweater. And, of course, I bought some dumb stuff, too." - Steve Martin
While hilarious, this is one of the funny money quotes from Steve Martin that also reminds us that while money is helpful for many things, it can also be used to buy silly things that we don't need and maybe don't even want. So it pays off to make thoughtful purchases instead of just having great possessions that are pointless.
4. "Rich people have small TVs and big libraries, and poor people have small libraries and big TVs." - Zig Ziglar
A Zig Ziglar quote that shows how what we choose for entertainment and how much we value knowledge can contribute to our overall wealth. While it may not be accurate in every situation and is humorous, it may indicate the value we place on finances.
5. "Money is like manure. You have to spread it around or it smells." - JP Getty
Here we have one of the most memorable funny finance quotes from JP Getty. When we spend and save and budget our money, it's important to be generous when we can and give to other people, too. Otherwise, we risk becoming greedy, which can almost guarantee we'll end up miserable.
6. "A bargain is something you can't use at a price you can't resist." - Franklin Jones
Although it's nice to find something for a great price, just because something is on sale doesn't make it worth buying. It's a smart practice to ask yourself if you would buy the item if it were full price. If not, it may not be such a great deal after all.
7. "It's money. I remember it from when I was single." - Billy Crystal
One of the best funny finance quotes from Billy Crystal about how things can change when you're sharing a budget with a spouse! Although your expenses and goals are likely to change after marriage, that doesn't mean you can't work as a team. Saving and spending well is still possible as long as you communicate about that part of your life.
When it comes to investing...
Investing is an important part of financial health. But these funny sayings about money give a unique perspective on how to ensure you'll have enough cash.
8. "The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket." – Kin Hubbard
While this frugality quote from Kin Hubbard is undoubtedly funny, it's definitely not accurate. It turns out one of the safest ways to grow your money is actually through investing, not stashing it away in your back pocket, as this could later lead to empty pockets!
Money makes a terrible master when we're too afraid of losing it to try to make more of it, so it's important to have enough forethought to invest, even if it doesn't seem like the quickest way to wealth.
And you don't have to nickel and dime everything to become wealthy when you focus on investing. It's actually one of the best ways to increase your wealth!
Thought of by many as risky or scary, investing is not something to be afraid of. Savings accounts and self-denial can only take you so far.
If you're new to investing or want to expand your knowledge and earn a great deal of money, check out Clever Girl Finance's book Learn How Investing Works, Grow Your Money. You'll learn the very essence of successful investing and growing your wealth.
9. "October: This is one of the particularly dangerous months to invest in stocks. Other dangerous months are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February." -Mark Twain
It might make you laugh, but this quote from Mark Twain speaks to the simple fact that we need to know what we're doing before we invest. While investing is an intelligent and logical thing to do, we'd be fools to try it out without first gaining some knowledge and understanding of what we're investing in. Before using up good wages to try and make a profit, read up and learn about your options.
10. "Money is like an arm or a leg. Use it or lose it." - Henry Ford
This practical quote from Henry Ford speaks to the dangers of letting money sit idle. If you're one of those folks who want to use every advantage to increase their income, try investing. Investing allows you to make a profit and get ready to buy things in the future.
11. "Avoiding the dumb things is the most important. Learn more, know limitations, avoid the dumb things." - Warren Buffett
When investing, one of the greatest things you can do is get more knowledge. Just because a stock market investment promises tons of money doesn't mean that it will deliver.
Take to heart this quote from the famous investor himself, and don't buy things that don't make sense. Who knows? It could make you one of the world's millionaires.
Funny saving money quotes
These funny saving money quotes are very relatable, but you can learn how to save money no matter how tight your budget is! These funny quotes about saving money might give you a new desire to keep as much of your cash as possible.
12. "Economists report that a college education adds many thousands of dollars to a man's lifetime income – which he then spends sending his son to college." – Bill Vaughan
There's no doubt that having kids is expensive! And sending your child (whether male, female, or non-binary – clearly, this quote about a man sending his son to college needs a modern update) to college can be really costly! This is one of the funny quotes from Bill Vaughan about saving money that shows just how much college can cost.
However, there are ways to plan for your children's college and formal education without spending your entire salary on it. For example, parents can invest funds for their children's education by setting up custodial accounts or 529 plans.
13. "I'm so poor I can't even pay attention." - Ron Kittle
Here is one of those funny saving money quotes from Ron Kittle that can be so spot-on that it hurts. Unfortunately, poverty can happen due to bad financial habits or even something beyond your control.
However, the good news is that you can break the cycle of being poor. You can also learn how to save money even on a low income!
Remember that every dollar counts, and if you find ways to be frugal, you can save money faster than you think!
14. "Many people take no care of their money till they come nearly to the end of it, and others do just the same with their time." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Ever wonder where all your time goes? This is one of those very true quotes from Johann Wolfgang von Goethe about saving money and time. It discusses how easy it is to waste our time and our money.
Using time wisely is a formula for wealth. It's one way to make your finances into an excellent servant that will help you throughout your life.
15. "A rich man is one who isn't afraid to ask the salesperson to show him something cheaper." - Jack Benny
This is one of the funny quotes about saving money that is very true! Jack Benny reminds us that sometimes people think that rich people are the ones who don't ask about the price at all. However, this isn't a fact, and if you're willing to look for the best deal, you could save yourself a lot of cash.
Imagine a couple of car payments that cost twice as much as they needed to, and you've got the right idea. When in doubt - just ask about less expensive alternatives.
16. "A simple fact that is hard to learn is that the time to save money is when you have some." - Joe Moore
Funny quotes about saving money can be true! Everyone knows they should save money, but the tricky part is when you do have some to save, it's pretty difficult to not spend it, as Joe Moore says!
Funny finance sayings about budgeting
Budgeting may be considered one of the virtues of handling money. It makes a gigantic difference!
These quotes highlight the importance of setting up a budget and reviewing it.
17. "Some couples go over their budgets very carefully every month, others just go over them." –Sally Poplin
Communication in relationships is important no matter the topic, and perhaps even more so when it comes to finances. Which type of couple are you? The one that sticks to a budget and takes care of their money or the one that totally ignores it?
If you and your partner haven't set up a budget yet, or are struggling to stick to one, it's time to get on the same page and create one that works for you.
18. "It's easy to meet expenses, everywhere we go, there they are." - Anonymous
Here's a quote that shows how nobody will ever run out of things to pay for. And yet, we can plan for our expenses through budgeting effectively.
We can make sure our bills don't get in the way of saving by starting to invest, not putting all our good eggs in one basket, and being organized with finance.
19. "A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore." - Yogi Berra
This saying from Yogi Berra speaks to how the price of things just keeps going up no matter what. While this is true, we can prepare for it by budgeting correctly. If we think about our annual income in terms of months and weeks of budgeting, organization is more manageable.
20. "Empty pockets never held anyone back. Only empty heads and empty hearts can do that." - Norman Vincent Peale
Regardless of how much money you're starting with, it's wise to budget. Even saving just a bit from each paycheck will help you do more with your money, this saying from Norman Vincent Peale reminds us.
Funny finance quotes about debt and borrowing
There's nothing funny about debt, but these funny money quotes definitely can teach us something.
21. "This would be a much better world if couples were in love as much as they are in debt." – Earl Wilson
Here's a quote from Earl Wilson that is darkly humorous because it's also quite accurate. Currently, about 80% of Americans are in debt. While it's hard to tell what percentage are in love, the point is that many of us are in debt.
Not only does debt limit opportunities, but it can also bring on a lot of stress, straining relationships along the way. If you prefer to stay in love more than in debt, start by coming up with a debt reduction strategy and get yourself out of debt for good.
22. "A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it." – Bob Hope
If you've ever applied for a loan, you know that you must meet specific eligibility requirements to qualify, as Bob Hope says. For some, it's impossible to meet these requirements. These people fall into the category of "unbanked" or "underbanked."
These people either have no bank account or have one but must rely on alternative financial services (like payday lenders) to meet their needs. According to the Federal Reserve, 22% of adults in the U.S. are either unbanked or underbanked.
By doing things like setting a budget, creating an emergency fund, and increasing your income, you can work to get yourself out of this category or avoid falling into it.
Funny sayings about money and how it makes you feel
From stress and anxiety to freedom to happiness, money elicits so many different emotions. These funny money quotes show just that.
23. "I finally know what distinguishes man from other beasts: financial worries." – Jules Renard
We've all felt it at one time or another – financial stress. Have you ever looked at your dog and wished you could trade places with them so that you could live their simple, easy life, free from financial worries? That's exactly what this quote from Jules Renard is getting at.
While there are many reasons people feel financial stress, one of the main reasons is low financial literacy. That's actually a good thing! Because if there's one thing we know you can do, it's become educated on your finances.
There's a reserve of knowledge in big libraries across the country, and your future self will thank you. Start with articles on this website, a book on money education, or one of Clever Girl Finance's completely free courses. Whatever you do, just start, and you'll immediately feel much less stressed!
24. "Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy." – Groucho Marx
While Groucho Marx jokes about getting out of obligations because he's rich, there is some truth to the words of this wise man! Money can buy many things. One of those things is the ability to pay someone else to do what you don't want to do.
If you have enough disposable income, you free yourself from spending time doing things you don't like. Money gives you the freedom to choose how to spend your time, which is priceless.
25. "All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy." – Spike Milligan
Here's a quote from Spike Milligan that talks about being a poor man. Money can buy a lot of things, but can it buy happiness? It's the age-old question!
There is some consensus that a certain baseline of money does, indeed, make you happy. Like this quote suggests, it's probably preferable to try to make as much money as you can. Just make sure you don't sacrifice important things on your way to accumulating more.
26. "Money can't buy happiness, but it will certainly get you a better class of memories." - Ronald Reagan
Here's a quote from President Ronald Reagan that humorously reminds us that while money can't buy you everything you want, it can definitely give you a lot of options that make life more exciting and fun. Because of this, it may be worth it to become wealthy.
27. "People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made." - Joan Rivers
The mere possession of money on its own really doesn't do anything for our overall happiness, as Joan Rivers reminds us. But this is one of the funny money quotes that shows us that there are times when money can get us the things we want.
Having specific experiences or items may make us happy short term. Depending on how we use our money, it can bring us some joy as we experience life.
Funny sayings about money when it comes to kids
Humor is one of the best ways to connect with kids. These quotes will remind you to keep money education interesting for your children as they learn how important financial literacy is.
28. "Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." - Thomas Edison
Sometimes we all wish we could get rich quickly without much effort. It's important to teach children the skill of hard work and earning money.
There's a lot of joy of achievement with work, as this Thomas Edison quote makes clear, and we shouldn't seek to get away from it but instead use it to create more financial stability for ourselves. The sooner kids understand this, the better their lives can be.
29. "Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt." - Herbert Hoover
Here is one of the funny money quotes that reminds us that debt can affect many generations. There is actually a lot to consider from this saying by President Herbert Hoover.
It's important to think of the ways that we can solve money problems now, so they aren't passed on to our children and grandchildren. Instead, we should set them up for success as much as possible.
Funny money quotes about getting rich quickly
The easiest way to get rich is probably not what you think it is! The only real security is saving, working hard, and having a mindset that helps you succeed.
Spoiler alert: hard work and years of sound financial planning is the way to have enough money. The thrill of creative effort can also help you develop new ideas for making and keeping your money. If you enjoy learning, you are more likely to succeed.
30. "There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune: go there with a large one." – Jack Yelton
We've all dreamt about winning the lottery or striking it big in Vegas. But is it really possible to get rich quickly? For some, things like winning the Powerball actually happen.
But it's not something we can bet on. Like this quote says, the surest way to leave a casino rich is not by winning at the gambling tables but by starting out rich.
Instead of hoping to get lucky and get rich quick, you're much better off putting your energy toward saving, investing, and paying off your debt.
31. "There is a gigantic difference between earning a great deal of money and being rich." - Marlene Dietrich
Here's an ironic quote from Marlene Dietrich that reminds us that just because someone makes a high income doesn't mean they're rich. If you get rich quickly but don't have the discipline to save it and use it wisely, it won't matter. It will soon be gone.
But if you work hard and save and invest, even if you don't make a large paycheck, you can still be rich.
Funny money quotes can teach real lessons!
There you have it! Some of the funniest quotes about money, each with a life lesson. We've included funny quotes about saving money, funny investing quotes, and more.
Hopefully, some of these have inspired you to up your own personal finance game and continue to use self-education on all things money, which will make you a wise person. Knowing more about money can also create a sense of order for your life to help you stay organized. For even more inspiration, here's our favorite quotes about becoming debt free, and budgeting quotes to help you manage your finances.